I may not be doing this perfectly, but I’m down 5 pounds! 205 is a long way from where I want to be, but it is less than I was a week ago.
It’s been two weeks now, and some of the beta testers for BeNew have lost twice as much as I have. The private fb page is encouraging most of the time, but not when I allow the comparison bug to bite me. I want this to go faster, but hey, it’s going, right?
Real Time Update:
I just counted. I’ve been at this weight loss thing for 82 days. And while some things get easier–like less cravings or more stamina while walking or being able to add in another 15 crunches to my routine–some things stay hard.
Like watching the scale.
When I started this blog 14 days ago I was down almost 30 pounds. Today I am down almost 30 pounds. Very little change (at least according to the scale). Talk about frustrating! I’m doing the same stuff, just stalled out.
The battle right now is in my mind. I know from the last time I hit a plateau that if I just keep doing what I’m doing, one day I’ll get on the scale, and there will be a drop. I can’t let the scale dictate my mood or my determination to keep up the hard work of weight loss. The scale cant make me reach for cream-filled donuts or blow off exercising.
Today I ran into one of my daughter’s friends. I was surprised when she didn’t initially greet me. Then all the sudden, she sprang from where she was sitting and rushed over to me. “Miss Paula! I didn’t recognize you. You’re so skinny!” It helped.
But people didn’t notice the difference the first ten or more pounds. So really, our journey can’t be based on the scale or the affirmation of people. It has to be based on something else.
For me, this journey is about embracing a gift of life-change. It’s about reclaiming my body, moving with ease, feeling comfortable in my clothes. I watched Mama-Mia last night, enthralled as women older than I danced in freedom.
I want that.
But, for me, this weight loss journey is yet more.
It’s also embracing God.
That may sound crazy, but I know He is in this with me, cheering me on, wanting to see me at the weight He created me to be. For years I embraced God with my heart and mind, but put up a “No Access” sign when it came to my body. Slowly I’m allowing Him here, too. And it isn’t hard to imagine a twinkle in His eyes when I walk or run–or even just hop out of a chair with no effort.
One of my favorite verses from the Bible says, “Keep your eyes on Jesus.” Since that second car accident the impact of this verse has deepened. There has been much I didn’t understand–and some I still don’t–about what happened to my body and emotions in that last crash.
As I’ve dealt with a new depth of emotional and physical trauma, I’ve clung to the fact that my Creator loves me and has only the best in mind for me. Survival is fixing a trusting gaze on Jesus and waiting for His healing gifts.
And one of those gifts is BeNew.
So I embrace this gift of health, set my gaze on Jesus and the prize ahead–and keep going no matter what the scale says in the morning.
What keeps YOU going when the scale or people or stress discourages you? Where do you fix your gaze when you need to keep on keepin’ on?