Resuscitation

After my last post Tom said, “Write and God will follow your writing.” breath

I read his comments a few times, letting them sink into my hungry, dry soul.

Then it hit me. “God will follow your writing.” Suddenly I grinned, imagining that one of the “followers” of this blog is God Himself.

Then I realized the truth of that imagining.

God does. He follows my blog! He was first and most important follower to grace it with His notice. Anyone else who reads comes after.

I knew this, but I didn’t. I know now. Differently.

And somehow everything I do here seems more important.

Validated.

I once again find my courage.

Because even if I’m afraid to write for you I’m am not afraid to write for Him.

HE sees.

HE cares.

When there is not one single comment or facebook share or new follower, when I fear I’m just rambling about my life and that my words will not resonate with anyone, He still cares.

He is my first reader.

And do you know what? He likes my rambling, my attempts at humor, my efforts to be artistic. He even likes the posts that are not deep or creative or even particularly interesting.

He likes them because I’m His, and Good Daddys care about the stuff their daughters do.

Are interested in what they create.

Want to know what pours from their hearts.

It doesn’t seem so scary now that I remember Who my Primary Audience is. I can quit trying to figure this blog out, stifled because I’m not sure what it’s all about since the focus is no longer primarily weight loss. I can let the scattered thoughts, all pieces of myself, just sprinkle forth, pouring out in whatever form is revealed.

Because HE wants to see my next post.

Pours His water upon me, lets me drink, and watches what spills over onto this screen.

Droplets.

Rivers maybe.

The prayers I requested in my last post? I think they are already pushing back the clouds. I feel the Son peeking in and illuminating the Way.

Please keep breathing on behalf of my writing life, blowing against that fog that’s been trying to hide the way out. The fog that’s swirled and thickened, heavy upon my heart, weighing it down. The fog full of voices that I shouldn’t listen to, voices that try to cloak their origin, try to convince me they are truth instead of folly.

Please keep that God-breath coming my friends.

I am being resuscitated.

Until Next Time,

paula cropped

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10 thoughts on “Resuscitation

  1. paulfg January 22, 2015 at 11:41 am Reply

    You can stay awake a long time!! 🙂 Lovely post Paul – lovely!!

    • paulfg January 22, 2015 at 11:41 am Reply

      Sorry about missing your “a”!

  2. Julie Harris January 22, 2015 at 12:44 pm Reply

    I loved your post today. When we don’t get any “likes”, “comments”, or any kudos from anyone- we have to focus on why we do it and who we do it for- our audience of “one” – out of obedience to Him! Thanks for sharing your heart today 🙂 Blessings!!

  3. realchange4u January 22, 2015 at 4:53 pm Reply

    I had to laugh at the word resuscitation. I had to look at how to spell that. Remember I’m a Okie. Now wow! Look what came out of her heart. You know Paula. I’m so thankful for the wonderful post and stories I read in the blogs I follow. There are so many talented and wise folks that I have met. Every one of you are so special to me. I am anticipating your next post. I also would like to say that I’m so happy Paul introduced us. I love his heart so much. A precious man for sure.

    Peace & Joy to you & yours

    • Paula Moldenhauer January 22, 2015 at 11:17 pm Reply

      hahaha. This Okie double-checked her spelling on this one, too. ;o) And I am in agreement with you. Some of the most meaningful blogs I’ve found came through a connection to Paul–and I love what he writes as well. Blessing on your day and your family, Tom. Thank you again for inspiring this post. Your thoughts last night really helped.

  4. Rebekah January 23, 2015 at 2:59 am Reply

    I am deeply grateful our paths have crossed here in blog land. Your words are always a blessing to me. I love the idea of writing for God first and foremost. It is easy to get so confused over who is out there.

  5. Paula Moldenhauer January 23, 2015 at 3:08 am Reply

    I feel the same about you, Rebekah. And just so you know–I’ve told some young moms about your blog. I’ve recently done some speaking engagements for MOPS and other mom groups. I like to share your stuff because it is so great at connecting on a real level.

  6. […] A few nights ago, determined to get words onto a screen I typed a vulnerable post about my struggle to write. A friend’s comment grounded me, and I remembered my Audience of One. […]

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