That Circle Thing

flowersYou can’t give to someone else what you don’t have.

I think about that a lot.

Especially when it comes to the most important things in life, like love, grace, joy, hope . . .

And especially when it comes to the most important people in life, like hubby, kids, best friends.

My journey around this concept began around the idea of grace. I had a really hard time accepting grace. It was always so much easier to see my flaws than my goodness, especially in mothering. It took some pretty hard stuff for me to come to the end of myself and begin to receive grace.

It’s amazing when you forgive yourself how much easier it is to forgive others.

It’s crazy how when you receive grace, love, and all those beautiful things how much easier it is to share them.

In my weird life process I think it ought to be a clue. When I’m easily irritated or quick to blame or judgmental am IĀ blocking that circle of love and grace that flows from Him to me and out of me and back to Him? (I hope I can learn to slow down and ask instead of letting the negative build.)

That’s part of the season I am in right now–trying to separate appropriate empty nest grief from anger with myself for not being able to move on more quickly. Seeking to discern what irritation is perimenopausal hormones and what is connected to something else.

As I process this stuff I am sent back to foundational thinking. Where am I putting pressure on myself that God hasn’t? (That always causes the steam to build inside.) Where is there a legitimate issue I need to work through, and where do I simply need to take more focused time to rest in Love?

Sometimes I think we get so focused on fixing (ourselves and others) that we forget LOVE.

And isn’t that where the deep healing happens?

Until Next Time,

paula cropped

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2 thoughts on “That Circle Thing

  1. Marie Keates February 5, 2015 at 11:29 pm Reply

    Negativity is a tough nut to crack. My best weapon is those little things I’m always banging on about. Seeing a tiny flower or a discarded swan feather, I can’t help but smile and the smile banishes the negative thoughts like magic.

    • Paula Moldenhauer February 5, 2015 at 11:42 pm Reply

      Much wisdom there, my friend. Yes. Thank you for the reminder. That’s part of what I was learning when I wrote my 1000 gratitudes on my hallway wall. And that’s where I need to focus still–on life’s simple gifts.

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