Tag Archives: success

How Do I Show Up?

Successful career. Successful relationship.

Finances. Respect.

The list could go on, couldn’t it? The one of things that get in the way of true living. (Notice I didn’t say the list of things wrong to desire.)

But don’t they get in the way?

Of the good moments.

We miss too many of life’s beautiful moments because our focus is in on worrying about something on the list.

They get in the way.

Of productivity.

It slows when fear of financial problems, a need to succeed, or managing relationship replaces creative energy.

Of delight.

There’s nothing like fear and striving and worry to zap life’s joy.

Of healthy relationship.

Relationships are harder when we worry about success or think they can be managed.

Of success itself.

How far could we go if life wasn’t driven by the need to succeed? Is it success if we’re constantly grasping and fearing its loss?

What if we lived from passion instead?

Passion to bless.

God and others. In daily interaction. In work, even work that doesn’t feel like calling offers opportunity to bless. In relationships, even when they aren’t fun.

Passion to receive love and share it.

Humans know how to love because they were first loved by their Creator. (We love because He first loved us.) So we take a stand and shout to the world (and mostly that negative, nagging voice in our head), “I am loved!” Then we pause and reflect the love back to its origin. “I love you, too, God!” Then we step into our families, our friendships, our work place, our Facebook groups, our schools, our blogs . . .  our life. We step into life and love others with the love we are given.

Passion to move forward as our true selves.

To let the real us, the strong, true, gifted person who wants to bless and love, show up in the world. (Which means we constantly tell the fearful, striving, success-craving, down-on-herself/himself, selfish voices to shut up.) We acknowledge our strengths. Enjoy them, even. Believe that we were designed with a uniqueness this world needs.

What if we stopped chasing success and instead stepped boldly into life from our passion?

Wouldn’t this be the ultimate act of glorifying the One who made us?

Until Next time,

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PS These thoughts rolled out this morning as I deal with real life. I write as a sojourner, longing desperately to put aside my self-absorption, worries, and fears to live out my destiny.  To be all-in with God and to be put out with fear. To let my neediness fall aside as I focus on my passion. As I seek to trust God with my life instead of grasping for things that cannot fill me up. To be about passionate work with eternal significance, not chasing a paycheck or significance or career advancement. To believe God will supply all my needs and that I am free to go about my Father’s business without letting lesser things slow my productivity and advancement.

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Authenticity, Courage, My Hubby, and DtC

For a year and a half I’ve let it all “hang out” here at A BeNew Journey. I’ve admitted my struggles with weight, with cravings, with grace. I’ve invited you to taste the hopes and successes even as I’ve invited you to walk through the struggles with me. In return I’ve been given the grace of wonderful support from you, my readers, friends, and fellow bloggers. You’ve cheered me on, wept with me, and shared your stories, too. Thank you.

This weekend my husband did something incredible. He began his own journey of public authenticity.1597648_10202467803671428_1674233776_o Over the years he’s allowed me to share bits of our story, but on Sunday he wrote a blog post that gives a glimpse into one of his most personal areas of struggle and pain, and he talks about how he is processing out of old paradigms to overcome.

Marking my weight loss journey through this blog has been a bit of an unveiling so I can succeed. It’s taken courage to talk about this place of shame in my years of obesity and courage to invite you into my successes. Jerry’s latest two blogs, Before and After with the DtC Movement Part I and II, are the beginning of his own courageous unveiling. I gave him permission to start with my story. I was thrilled when he used it for a springboard for his own.

Please take a moment to visit his new website, DtC Zone, to catch a glimpse of how finding the courage to face financial struggles can be a launchpad into hope and success.

I’m proud of my courageous husband. I’ve watched with awe as he has fought for the last few years to enter a place of pain and push through to the other side. He grabbed hold of a new way of thinking. Once he grasped this new paradigm, he then had to learn to walk it out. He is doing so with determination and faith, looking consistently to His God for direction and asking God to teach him to be the provider he desires to be for the family he loves.

Jerry and I are very excited about the DTC movement and how this new concept combines a tried and true method of producing income with the innovation and opportunities of this new age of social media.

I invite you to follow Jerry’s blog. To glimpse his own journey of transformation as you have mine.  If you intrigued, then why not follow the links he’s provided and consider not only watching, but entering this journey with him.

I entrust you into the hands of the man who has taken good care of me. I know Jerry will be faithful and loyal to those of you who choose to journey with him. His track record is proven by the loyalty, devotion, and faithfulness the kids and I have enjoyed the last 25 years.

Monday Morning Makeover ~ Heart of the Matter

Want to find hope and healing and success? Let’s get to the heart of the matter! How? We can start at our mouths and follow the trail. Solutions don’t come from treating the symptoms, but the symptoms can give us clues to the cause, then we can truly heal from the inside out.

Video: Want hope and healing? Follow the trail to the heart

Spirit Seeker Sunday ~ New Perspectives

Buena Vista 5“I can instead of I can’t is a powerful little twist of phrase for a girl feeling deprived” (Lysa TerKeurst).

In life and in food we humans have a tendency to want whatever it is we think we can’t have. If our thoughts get into that cycle of thinking about everything we can’t have, that’s what we want!

But what if when we’re tempted to something that is permissible, but not beneficial, we twist that negative to the positive: I can be healthier and slimmer. I can eat one piece of chocolate instead of five. I can enjoy a salad tonight. I get to bask in the sunshine as I walk today.

For the first months of my weight loss journey I tracked everything that went into my mouth on the My Fitness Pal app on my phone. As I got closer to my goal I stopped tracking calories, but continue to eat the way I learned in those three months that I tracked my food. The lack of specific accountability made it a little harder to be wise, but was also a good transition to life-style change, not just weight loss.

As I made changes some of the twist of phrases I used were:

  • I can eat one small handful of chocolate mixed with walnuts instead of several and only chocolate.
  • I can be satisfied with one helping at supper tonight.
  • I can enjoy my smaller sized clothes–and continue to enjoy them by choosing to fill my plate with a lot of salad and a little pasta instead of the other way around.
  • I can go to bed without a snack even though I didn’t get a full supper tonight. It’s worth it to keep losing weight instead of pigging out late at night. I had a full lunch, and I can enjoy a big breakfast in the morning.

It’s really about perspective, isn’t it?

As I journeyed to my 55 pound weight loss, this was my prayer:

God,
I want this journey to be a lifestyle change, not a one time experience that doesn’t last. Please help me not to return to mindless eating. Help me to resist returning to junk food. Give me a desire for the wonderful, nutritious food You created. Help me to add movement to my days. Thank you for helping me choose not just what is permissible, but a lifestyle that is beneficial.

It is still my prayer today.

What “I can” twists of thought can you embrace this week?

Share it!

A twist of phrase can bring success!

Nip it in the Bud

budOne of the biggest concerns about weight loss is: what if I just gain it back? This pesky question haunted me, and I hear it often from friends.

My answer after a few months of living in the maintenance stage? Sure, the temptation is there to forsake new, healthy habits, but nip it in the bud! Deal with the issue early on this time instead of waiting until the weight has crept up and the body is weaker again.

Of course this is easier said than done.

My goal is to approach this issue with intentionality, but not worry. (Of course sometimes the worry creeps in, and sometimes I’m not intentional, but then I remind myself that life isn’t about my ability to live it perfectly every second, but to keep on track over the long haul.)

When I lost weight I purposely didn’t do extreme changes I knew would be hard to maintain. I tried to make it simple: move more, eat less. I chose a healthy support system, not fad diet pills, but products that were actually good for me and helped me build toward strengthening my body, not just weight loss.

Now that I’m seeking to maintain, I find these values are a part of who I am instead of something new I’m cultivating. Still, it is harder to hang onto their application when I’m satisfied instead of not. Last year I took long walks in all kinds of awful weather, but this winter it’s much easier to choose comfort over cold.

But a friend shared her trick, and it seems to be working for me. (It must work for her because she is one of those spunky tiny grandma types, full of energy and keeping the weight off!) Here’s what she does: She weighs herself daily. If she notices a weight gain, she cuts calories to 1200 for a day or two until she returns to her target weight. That way she nips weight gain in the bud, dealing with it when it’s a couple of pounds, not ten.

I’m still at the stage of life when weight can fluctuate around female cycles. I’ve given myself a target weight and allow fluctuation within 3 pounds without getting uptight. But if it pops up to 4-5 pounds above that base (instead of 2-3), I cut back on calories and increase movement.

I also don’t weigh daily like my friend does, but I make a point to weigh in every few days, so i can keep things in check. I usually know when I’ve slipped on healthy choices, even before the scale tells me. Sometimes, like last weekend when I spent some time away with my husband, I choose a short season of “feasting.” Back-to-back meals out are not common for us, and Jerry and I chose to enjoy the elegance of the fancy food at the Broadmoor (pictures coming soon!)–then came home to more realistic eating! Monday morning’s step onto the scale confirmed my need for it!

How about you? Any maintenance tricks?

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A plan to overcome the fear of gaining the weight back

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PS Some of you have asked about using the BENew products during maintenance. Since the products are all-natural and healthy, you can use them long-term. I have friends who weren’t/aren’t overweight but use half doses of the metabolism booster because it’s healthier than a cup of coffee, boosts energy, and fights the unhealthy visceral fat that even skinny people have. Some choose to do the BEPure monthly cleanse for the health benefits, not weight loss. Those who were strictly weight loss focused and reached their goals have done everything from stopping the products to cutting them in half, to continuing with them. Many of them also now take Body Balance to support good nutrition and health. I’ve chosen to continue partial usage of BENew and take my Body Balance daily. Not only do I want to support the maintenance stage, but I feel good on the products and believe in their health benefits.

Monday Morning Makeover ~ Open War II

If you missed Open War I watch this video first!

No good general chooses battle without first taking stock of the situation and the resources he possesses. Open war is upon us. We need to engage. But this doesn’t mean jumping into every battle without wisdom.

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Monday Morning Makeover video ~ Open War II

Monday Morning Makeover ~ Open War I

Too often I allowed ground to be taken from me instead of advancing in life. The most visual area is in the area of weight gain. Pretending the pounds weren’t creeping on, ignoring the battle waged against my body, didn’t make it go away. Open war was upon me whether I risked engagement or not.

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Open war is upon you whether you would risk it or not (Aragorn, Lord of the Rings)

Back to Healthy Choices and BeNew Thinking

The holidays are over, and with their disappearance needs to come the release of an indulgent attitude!

For me, it’s back to what I know. Just because I entered 2014 at a normal weight for the first time in years doesn’t mean I can return to old habits. And like my devotional on Sunday admitted I did a little too much indulging over the holidays.

The great thing about my new lifestyle is I now realize how easy it is to nip back thinking in the bud and get back to the goal of a forever healthier, thinner me. (So initially “back” thinking was a typo, but I liked it and left it! It’s not just bad thinking that needs to go, it’s back thinking, thinking from the old days that takes me backward!)

Here’s my plan.

Step 1: Return to being mindful of how I treat my body. This is not only important while actively losing weight, this is for the REST OF MY LIFE.

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Step 2: Do a gentle, healthy cleanse to help my body stay strong and release toxins from the crud I brought into my system with holiday eating. I’m using the BeNew Gentle Detoxifying Cleanse, called BEPure. I’ve found a cleanse also helps reduce cravings for more bad food.

Step 3: Make the next better choice. As I pre-schedule this post I’m taking a break from days of long hours of writing fiction to meet a deadline. The old Paula would have devoured chocolate when the creativity waned and then munched on salty snacks while staring at the computer screen. And don’t think I wasn’t IMAG3213tempted. But instead of allowing the stress to take me into mindless eating of empty calories, I’m enjoying lunch as I write–and today, at least, I made the better choice: A healthy protein shake with mangos, blueberries, strawberries, and almond milk. Mmm. (I’m using the BeNew vanilla protein shake. With the frozen fruits blended in it’s almost like ice cream!)

Step 4: Determination to MOVE. In the house on the cold days–a few sit-ups, maybe even a workout video. Walks on the warmer days. Taking a break from the computer even if it’s just to do some stretches.

Share: What’s your healthy choices plan?

*BTW, the BeNew weight loss/nutritional products I chose for my health journey are on an amazing New Year’s Resolution special. Until the end of this month you can actually buy one month and get one month totally free! The company even paired the whole weight loss program with Body Balance, the best nutritional support available, IMHO. Follow my links, or contact me for more information. If you are a new customer and order by phone instead of on-line, you’ll get free shipping, too! I also made a video explaining how to use the products. I’ll post it after I meet my book deadline, but if you want a sneak preview it’s already on YouTube.

Monday Morning Makeover ~ Simple but not Easy

The secret to weight loss can be simple even when it isn’t easy.

Weight loss: simple but not easy

Monday Morning Makeover ~ Are You Photoshopping Your Life?

Your Life: Real or photo-shopped?