Maybe it was just another one of those expressions Christian use that was supposed to make me feel better.
But it didn’t.
And that made me feel worse because it sounded so spiritual?
And I wanted to be a good Christian.
“Just lay it down. Leave it at the cross.”
Only no matter how I nodded my head and tried to feel better about that concern being at the foot of the cross, it didn’t truly help. It made a little more sense when the saying was used to encourage me to let go of guilt or shame.
But it didn’t help with worry.
Recently a friend and I were talking about giving a huge concern to the Lord. She said, “I know, I know. I just have to lay it down.”
And suddenly I thought that wasn’t really what I meant at all.
The well-meaning phrases gave me a visual of passivity. A good little Christian should be able to trust God so much that she can just let go and give it to God and walk away from the worry.
In my mind I saw my very real concern wrapped up, almost like a present, laying at the foot of the cross.
I gave it to God. Now I wasn’t supposed to worry anymore. But in the picture in my head my very important concerns were at the foot of the cross. Just LYING THERE. But that’s as far as the visual went. Were they forgotten? How long before God picked them up and DID something?
I can’t tell you how many times the LORD has asked me, “Do you trust me?”
I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had to let go of control, let go of worry, let go of very real problems I couldn’t solve.
There really is something to that. I’m not saying there isn’t. It’s just that sometimes all that Christian verbiage of “lay it down . . . let it go . . . walk away . . . release it to God” don’t really make me feel like letting go.
But what what I’ve learned is when I give something over to God, it’s into his hands. He not only holds it for me, He ACTIVELY works in the situation. He is never idle, never forgetful, never leaving my precious struggles lying forgotten on the ground.
MOVING. STRATEGIZING. WEAVING IT ALL TOGETHER. REMAKING. SOMETIMES EVEN TEARING DOWN FOR THE PURPOSE OF REBUILDING.
When I’m asked to “let go” it’s not so I can be peaceful while nothing changes. I only let go to LET GOD have the primary RESPONSIBILITY and INFLUENCE in the situation.
I’m not really walking away from my concerns, I’m simply giving them over to His leadership. I’m relinquishing my “right” to be in charge, to think I know best, to try to fix things in my own limited strength and wisdom.
I’m getting my hands far enough away that they don’t hinder the Hands of the Master Fixer, Master Designer, Master Weaver.
And I’m awaiting guidance to do my part.
Because He often has something I’m to do. It’s just not usually the controlling thing I was doing.
I’m never just laying my burden down. I’m always giving it over into more capable hands.
Working hands, not idle hands.
Loving hands, not disengaged hands.
Never abandoned. Never ignored. Never forgotten.
Always embraced. Always given attention. Always remembered.
Until next Time,