Fighting it Through

20140219_144018Here I sit with the same old struggle.

You’d think after more than a year of a healthier lifestyle I wouldn’t fight this battle anymore.

I’m upset.

And I want a cookie. Or several.

Or a nap.

Actually I want both, in that order.

An innocent conversation turned into something different. Though I don’t believe there are lasting hurts, my emotions feel worn-out and tangled.

And why does that have to lead to food?

Why isn’t my first response to do something good for me–take a walk, say a prayer, cry a little and let it go?

But even though I know eating will NOT fix me, even though I know mindless eating (especially of empty calories) will HURT me, my overwhelming desire is to nurse my wounds with food.

This is another reminder that food struggles are more addictions than habits. Habits can be changed in 30 days; addictions must be stood up to for the long term.

The struggle decreases with time, but it doesn’t disappear.

And so we come full circle to where I started not only in this post, but over a year ago: Fighting the craving for sugar. Reminding myself it will hurt my body and do nothing to settle my emotions.

Today I stopped. I wrote out my feelings here instead of eating them. I had a big glass of lime water. I don’t always. But today I fought through.

That’s what we do, my friend. We persevere. We continue on. We fight it through. We refuse to be defeated in our journey to emotional and physical freedom.

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Fight though emotional cravings

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8 thoughts on “Fighting it Through

  1. Lyndatjie February 20, 2014 at 8:57 am Reply

    I also called myself an emotional and stress eater… until I realised that eating out of emotion and stress caused me even more stress… So now I just politely pour myself a cup of green tea and sip on that when ever I get into this state.
    But WOW on your incredible achievement – you look like a rock star!

    • Paula Moldenhauer February 20, 2014 at 5:06 pm Reply

      Hey, I’ll take the rock star comment! lol And I agree, eating from stress just makes more stress as my body doesn’t meet its goals . . . love the green tea comment. No calorie healthy teas has been a lifesaver for me on this journey.

  2. KittyHere February 20, 2014 at 6:58 pm Reply

    I so relate. Cookie, cookie, my inner child does believe sweets can heal a lot. I also believe my brain is wired to respond to carbs like nothing else, or perhaps it is the sugar/fat combo. Found your blog today and will follow.

    • Paula Moldenhauer February 20, 2014 at 8:47 pm Reply

      Welcome, Kitty! Maybe you and I need to find another name for our inner child, lol. Thanks for the levity! Visited your blog today, and I think we have a lot in common. It’s actually proven that the visceral fat (not regular belly fat, but the inner stuff around our organs) makes us crave sugar/carbs, so I think our brains ARE wired to respond to them PHYSICALLY as well as emotionally . . . I mean as kids candy/cookies/etc was the TREAT. Still is I guess.

      • KittyHere February 20, 2014 at 8:59 pm

        Agreed. I spend over a decade on an SSRI (antidepressant) which makes me think my brain is extra receptive. Still not a reason to give up on improving the nutritional quality of my food choices.

  3. Paula Moldenhauer February 20, 2014 at 9:15 pm Reply

    For sure! It can be a real challenge. I’ve had friends who’ve completely walked away from carbs/sugar, but not sure I’m a believer in that, especially in extremes. Some of them say it is easier to stop completely than to have portion control. I can see that, but I’m not ready to never have another cookie–or dark chocolate raspberry. ;o)

  4. mariekeates February 22, 2014 at 1:32 pm Reply

    Some battles we win some we lose. As long as we win more than we lose and don’t give up the fight…

    • Paula Moldenhauer February 22, 2014 at 4:36 pm Reply

      Great reminder, Marie. It’s the battle not the war. It’s the sprint vs the marathon. Thank you.

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